How To Create A Calming Ritual For Your Child (and Yourself!)

The Power of Rituals in a Busy World

If you’ve ever tried to get a child to calm down after a long, overstimulating day, you know it’s no easy task. Between school, activities, and screen time, kids today have more stimulation than ever. And let’s be honest—adults aren’t much different. We juggle schedules, responsibilities, and endless to-do lists, often feeling just as frazzled by the end of the day as our little ones.

So how do we help our children (and ourselves) transition from chaos to calm? The answer lies in calming rituals—small, intentional moments woven into daily life that create a sense of safety, comfort, and emotional regulation.

When my own grandchildren struggled to wind down during the day or at night, I discovered that introducing a simple, soothing routine with Grandma’s Magic Pillow made a world of difference. The transformation was remarkable—not only did they settle easier, but I found myself relaxing right along with them. This photo of my sweet grandson, Jack, is the first time I introduced him to Grandma's Magic Pillows. Look at that sweet smile :-)

A calming ritual isn’t just about getting kids to sleep—it’s about teaching them how to find peace within themselves. Let’s explore why these rituals are so powerful and how you can create one for your child (and yourself!).

Get Your Magic Pillows Here

Why Kids (and Adults!) Need Calming Rituals

Children thrive on predictability. When they know what to expect, it creates a sense of security, reducing stress and anxiety. Think about how comforting it is to have a familiar morning routine—coffee, a favorite chair, or a few deep breaths before the day begins. For kids, having a consistent ritual before bedtime, after school, or before a big transition can help them self-regulate their emotions.

Science backs this up. Studies show that consistent routines help lower stress hormones in both children and adults. When a child is anxious, their nervous system is on high alert. A familiar calming ritual signals to their brain: “You are safe. You can relax.”

But here’s the best part—these rituals don’t just help kids. They help parents too. When you take a moment to engage in a soothing practice with your child, you’re also grounding yourself. A few intentional moments of calm can reset the entire tone of your evening.

Simple Steps to Create a Calming Ritual

1. Set the Scene

Start by choosing when and where your calming ritual will happen. It doesn’t need to be long—even 5 to 10 minutes can be enough. Some great times to introduce a ritual include:

• Before bed (to wind down from the day)

• After school (to transition from busy energy to home life)

• Before a stressful event (doctor’s visits, school tests, etc.)

Heady the Hedgehog

This is Heady the Hedgehog, my assistant. When I do live events, I bring Heady to show children how to utilize their Magic Pillow. It's a fun demonstration and kids can't wait to try it themselves.

To make it extra effective, create a soothing environment:

• Dim the lights to signal it’s time to relax.

• Use cozy textures—soft blankets, pillows, or a favorite stuffed animal.

• Reduce distractions—turn off screens and noisy toys.

  
  

2. Introduce a Sensory Anchor

Using the senses can help deepen relaxation. Choose an element that your child connects with:

• Touch – Cuddle under a warm blanket, use a weighted or relaxation eye pillow, or hold hands for comfort.

• Smell – Diffuse lavender or chamomile essential oil, or use a scented pillow to reinforce the habit.

• Sound – Play soft instrumental music, nature sounds, or read a calming bedtime story. You might begin with some music but I strive towards silence to help them tune within and not be distracted with sounds.

A sensory anchor becomes a familiar cue that signals, It’s time to slow down.

3. Incorporate a Simple Mindfulness or Breathing Practice

Teaching kids to slow their breath helps their nervous system relax. Try:

• “Smell the flower, blow out the candle” breathing – Inhale deeply as if smelling a flower, then exhale slowly as if blowing out a candle.

• Gentle rocking or swaying – If your child enjoys movement, rock them in a chair or gently sway together. Keeping the Magic Pillow on can making rocking a challenge, but can be a great way to start. Who doesn't love rocking. My grandkids all loved rocking in my hammock.

• Progressive muscle relaxation – Have them squeeze their hands into fists, then slowly release.

Using Grandma’s Magic Pillow as a Relaxation Tool

One of the most effective ways to encourage relaxation is by giving children a physical tool to help them associate calmness with a familiar object.

Grandma’s Magic Pillow is a small, weighted eye pillow designed for children, filled with soothing flaxseed and lightly scented with lavender. It’s the perfect tool for a calming ritual because it:

• Gently blocks out light and other visual distractions to encourage relaxation.

• Provides a comforting weight to calm the nervous system.

• Gives children a sense of control—they get to choose their pillow and place it over their eyes when they’re ready to relax.

That’s the power of a simple ritual—children begin to self-soothe naturally.

Here’s how to use it:

1. Let your child pick their Magic Pillow each night.

2. Have them lie down, place the pillow over their eyes, and take three deep breaths.

3. Start with a short time (one minute) and then extend a little at a time

4. Read a short story (Grandma's Magic Pillows) while they rest.

5. Avoid music or other sensory input and help them adapt to quiet and calm.

This turns bedtime into a moment of calm instead of struggle.

How to Make It Work for Parents Too

Calming rituals shouldn’t just be for kids—parents need them just as much. Here’s how you can make it work for you:

• Model calm behavior – If you slow your breathing, your child will too.

• Use your own relaxation tool – Try a lavender relaxation eye pillow, essential oils, or a warm cup of tea after tucking your child in.

• Make it short and sweet – Even a few mindful breaths together can make a difference.

You don’t have to do everything perfectly—the key is consistency over time.

Troubleshooting: When Kids Resist or Struggle to Unwind

Some nights, kids will resist. That’s okay! Here’s how to handle it:

• If they’re too restless → Start with a calming movement activity, like stretching or gentle rocking.

• If they’re anxious → Offer comfort, but keep the routine steady. A consistent ritual builds trust over time.

• If they don’t want to participate → Give them choices. "Would you like to use your Magic Pillow or listen to a story first?"

The key is to stay calm yourself—kids mirror our emotions!

Building a Lifelong Habit of Calm

Rituals create deep emotional memories. One day, your child might not remember the specific details of every bedtime routine, but they’ll remember how safe and loved they felt.

By introducing a simple calming ritual, you’re giving them a lifelong tool for self-regulation—one they can carry into adulthood.

And the best part? You’ll benefit too. In the stillness of those few moments, you might just find that you’re breathing a little deeper, your shoulders are relaxing, and your heart feels a little lighter.

Because at the end of the day, we all need a little more calm in our lives.

Get Your Magic Pillows Here

Right now is the perfect time to get Magic Pillows for your child(ren) and yourself. Prices have been reduced and local pickup is now available as well.

My wish is always for you to Be Well.